Train Wrecks

No, this blog isn’t about actual train wreck. Shoot, why would I write something about that.

Before I get into today’s post, I must say that sometime today, there is supposed to be a post of a very short story that I wrote called “Adam’s First Day” on the Utah Children’s Writers blog. Here is a link for those too lazy to search. (Which should be all of you since you now have a link to click on and be magically transported there.)

I also have to add that Pandora.com is an awesome website. I get to hear my new favorite songs as well as some old favorites. Amazingly, I really like a couple of Linkin Park songs. Loser by Beck as well as Soundgarden’s Black Hole Sun take me back about ten-fifteen years. Jason Mraz’s I’m Yours as well as Life is a Highway by Rascal Flatts make my day even better.

Anyway, train wrecks. Today, I’m going to talk about reality tv shows: Hollywood’s ultimate train wrecks. To be on this list, it has to be a reality show I watched at least once. Therefore, shows like The Hills, America’s Next Top Model, Beauty and the Geek, and so forth, will not be on this list.

10. The Amazing Race: Out of all the reality shows. I think this is the least train wreck-ish. Yeah, they’ve had some dumb people on it. But it’s premise is awesome, it’s casting is on a higher level than any other. Shoot, one of few reality shows that has actually used other reality stars in its show. And they’ve used the decent ones that would play the game well.

9. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition: Yes, I think the Amazing Race is better because people win a million dollars and there are tasks to compete and I’m a competitive guy. Very competitive (Go Dodgers!) Anyway, Extreme Makeover is least train wreck-ish after The Amazing Race because of it’s charitable nature. It’s most train wreck-ish because some of those poor people still end up in foreclosure for whatever reason. Maybe income should be on their requirements from now on.

8. Survivor: Yeah, my favorite reality show isn’t the biggest train wreck here. And, seeing as how it’s being shown second, it’s not the smallest one either. Some seasons, Survivor rocks. Others, it bores until it gets to the final few episodes. You can click on the ‘Survivor’ category to read more thoughts on Survivor. But yeah, it’s an awesome show. I mean, it brought housewives Elisabeth Hasselback.

7. SuperNanny: It’s informative. The parents make me want to blow my brains out sometimes. Yeah, that’s worth it sometimes. But seriously, this show could be/have been (don’t even know if it’s still on) one of the best reality shows because it teaches us: No matter how bad your kids are, there are ones that are worse.

6. Dancing with the Stars: I have to admit, I like watching the people dance. I always have. If you really know me, you know I’m not afraid of getting in front of people and shaking my groove thing. But at the same time, did some of the celebs forget this is a dancing contest? For those watching this season, how did Kate Goselin (or whatever her name is) get on here? Last week she barely moved her feet. This week, she barely moved her head. One day, I hope, she’ll barely move her lips so we don’t have to hear her “it’s too hard!” Shoot, my grandmother moves better than her and she’s in her 80s. And what’s with that rapper (like forever ago) who couldn’t handle wearing dancing shoes. Was he afraid he’d look like a sissy or something? You do realize that most of the guys on there aren’t sissies. I’m sorry, I think Jerry Rice and Emmett Smith were pretty well liked in their manly sport. And what made the rapper better than either of them? Nothing. Shoot, Emmett won…somehow….so did Donny Osmond. (I still find that odd.)

5. How Do I Look: Better question….Why Did I Watch? I like Finola (whatever her name is), who played the mom on Charmed. Her accent is very nice to listen to. Mary liked this show. But wow, is it ever sad how some people dress (both before and after). There was another show that was similar that I thought was awful. But I can’t recall that one’s name right now.

4. Clean House: I’d still watch this show if I had the style channel. Niecy Nash and her random comments about the filthiness of people’s houses is just awesome. I still can’t believe a frat called her up. But she’s a very emotional woman. Still, this show has given Mary and I ideas on what we can do with our home. And some things that make us say “Put the old paint back!”

3. Celebrity Apprentice: What made me interested in watching this? Somehow, the combination of Cyndi Lauper, Sharon Osborne, Sinbad, and Bret Michaels made me interested. Yet, I find myself rooting for Michael Johnson, Summer Sanders, Selita (something-or-other-who-is/was-a-model), and Curtis (supposedly-a-celebrity-chef-I-never-heard-of). I was disappointed in Darryl Strawberry, but really glad that the chick who got fired the first episode is gone. Still, it’s a train wreck that’s always worth watching to me.

2. Big Brother: Watching U.S.’s Big Brother is like watching Girls Gone Boring. They always have to have someone that’s ‘good looking’ but then they just cry because someone hurt their feelings. Then they get guys that define ‘jerk’ in the house. Shoot, why they haven’t asked me to be in the house is a mystery to me still. Ah, but I love it despite its horribleness. And for the record, I will still watch it.

1.  Jon and Kate Plus 8: Um….not my fault. I tried numerous times to turn off this show. Mary loved watching it. I didn’t appreciate being compared to Jon. (I did like the ‘oh neverminds’ I got when his affairs were turned public.) Seriously, if I was married Kate (which would happen in the universe where all evil has taken over, the Jazz have won the NBA championship, the Lions are the best NFL team, and the U.S. has beat Belgium in the world cup), I would have divorced her long ago. (Watch, the three sporting events happen this year.) And for the record, I will still fight tooth and nail not to watch it.

And remember:

Alien abductions are involuntary, but probings are scheduled.

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One Response

  1. I’m glad I was able to get you to like LP. 🙂

    Friends of mine helped out on Extreme Home Makeover and said how the show is SO fake. The hosts do nothing and gripe about how their food isn’t gormet enough. Also, Ty isn’t there all the time as he’s filming 2 shows at once.

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